My Bloody Valentine

3D

  

Lionsgate 2009. Written by Todd Farmer and Zane Smith. Based on a screenplay by John Beaird and a story by Stephen Miller. Directed by Patrick Lussier. Starring Jensen Ackles, Jamie King, Kerr Smith, Betsy Rue and Tom Atkins

 
    By Stephen Pytak 
   The best of the slasher remakes to date, this "My Bloody Valentine" 
is like a doctorate thesis on what a good slasher film should be.
   It pays homage to the original, delivers some inventive kills, isn't 
afraid to some some skin and, in some theaters, delivered the thrills in 
amazing 3-D. 
   This is the best 3-D horror film I've seen. It's as if the makers of this 
film looked at every 3-D horror film that came before, studied what 
those films got right and pushed the envelope further.
   Prior to this, my favorite 3-D horror film was "Friday the 13th 
Part III in 3-D." I hosted a screening of that flick in Pottsville, Pa. 
back in October 2002. It packed the house. Fun experience. 
   Anyway, while "Friday III" had some neat effects, there were times 
the filmmakers were simply winking at the audience. Remember the 
scene where "Harold (Steve Susskind)" pushes a pole toward the 
camera (and out of the screen). Interesting shot, but it was obviously 
done just because the flick was in 3-D.
   The effects that fly in your face with the new "Valentine" involve you 
more in the movie, the action and the story. At the top of the show, we're 
given the backstory on the "Harry Morgan" character with a flurry of 
newspaper headlines. In no time, the audience is actually immersed in 
the story. It's surrounding us. While "Friday III" had a few memorable 
effects, including the eyeball poping scene, "Valentine" does its best to 
top it. It's got its own eyeball pop. It happens in the film's first 15 
minutes. And the killer menaces the audience again and again with his
pick axe. Fun stuff. I also liked how the shaft of light from the killer's 
helmet permeated the screen. I was like "wow!" I never saw a shaft of 
light head toward me in 3-D.
   If you go, make sure to stay until after the credits. There's a bit more 
3-D mayhem tagged onto the end. 
   The film won't play too badly as a regular 2-D feature either. It's got 
an O.K. story and keeps the killer miner in the action throughout the 
film. So there's lots to enjoy.
   What follows are a bunch of spoilers. So if you want to be surprised, 
stop reading. O.K. I warned you.
   The plot of the film isn't anything new. It's a cool riff on the original 
"My Bloody Valentine," with a dose of "Friday the 13th Part V: A New 
Beginning," "Friday the 13th Part VI: Jason Lives" and "High Tension" 
thrown in. Some critics said it feels like something cool they pulled out of 
their DVD collections. And that's about right.
   It's a formula slasher flick, and doesn't try to be anything else. It's as if 
the director embraced the concept and went for it. 
   There are GREAT kill scenes. My favorite is kind of a homage to a kill 
in "The Toolbox Murders (1977)," in which the killer chases a completely 
nude woman (Kelly Nichols I believe). In the new "Valentine" we have a 
scene like that, where the killer chasing a woman wearing only a pair of 
high heels, "Irene (Betsy Rue)." It's fantastic, fun and unexpected. 
   These days with so much PG-13 horror crap, you don't expect to see 
something like that, and IN 3-D! Wow!
   The only pet peeve I had -- and maybe it would have been overkill 
(pun intended) if they did it -- is the killer in this "Valentine" isn't a poet. 
The one in the original left little notes in his bloody heart boxes. It's kind 
of fun to hear those things. 
   Then again, the killer in this flick isn't trying to stop the town from 
holding a Valentine's Day dance or anything like that. Seems his motivation 
is simply Valentine's Day mayhem.
   So who's the killer?
   I'll give you a hint: it's the character who most resembles the Tommy Jarvis 
character from "Friday the 13th" parts V and VI. 
   By the way, I thought it was cool the film was shot in Kittanning, 
Pennsylvania, since I'm from Pa.

RATING OF FILM IN 2-D: Four stars (out of five)
RATING OF FILM IN 3-D: Five stars (out of five)
Copyright 2008 By Stephen Pytak